Our adoption Story

I have never sat down and documented our families adoption story, and it is something I need to do.  Asher was 6 and Nelson was serving as the bishop in our ward at the time.  We had kept saying that we needed to decide if we were going to have another kid since he was getting so old. Nothing seemed to happen for us and we could never make a decision of what needed to happen for our family. I was still struggling with my pain that went from my neck to my lower back and we were daily trying to figure that out.
A family in our ward, the Hyers, had adopted their grand daughter who was 4 months old.  Nelson had asked me to help watch her while the parents taught their primary class each sunday. I did this for a few weeks and would try to hold the baby during the meetings. I would come home each week, just sobbing. Holding the baby put my body in so much pain and I couldn't handle it.  After doing this for a few weeks I told Nelson that I really didn't think I could have a baby. I didn't think my body could handle it, as I could not even hold a baby without pain. 
We didn't say anything for awhile and went about doing our thing. One day I was driving to work in Layton after I got my kids on the bus for school. The thought had hit me (the spirit) to start looking into adoption.  Nelson came home that night and without me saying anything said "I started looking into adoption today." What ???? the spirit had spoke to us and guided us the same day.  This is a direction we never imagined we would head down.  We decided we had better fast and pray and see if this is what we needed to do. We got that confirmation yes it was.
We were very clueless and had no idea what we were doing, the only thing we could think to do was just move.  We decided if we started doing our part heavenly father would direct us where we needed to go. We looked into LDS services, adoption agencies etc.. None of this was the right direction. We ended up looking into Foster Care but was still leary about it. I remember we had our first meeting and I told the lady we would have one placement and we would adopt that one placement.  Now knowing what we know I am sure she thought we were the dumbest people alive. That is not how the process normally works.
We started our classes and all the certification we needed to get done.  This took a while but we could the lords hand in it all. Nelson missed church meetings on Weds for a whole month and never had to make them up, this is not normal.
It took us about 6 months to do the classes and get our certification finalized.  The classes started in March of 2011 and in Nov of 2011 we got a call asking if we would take in 2 girls.  The only advice I was given by a co worker was to pray and listen to the spirit and you will know what to do.  We did that and asked them to give us a day to figure out what our decision was.  We ended up saying yes. We were scared, terrified and had no idea what we were doing.
We started in the process of meeting them and having them come to our house for a few hours over Thanksgiving break.  We meet Liliana (4) and Passion (7) and loved them instantly.  Passion was very street smart and knew her way around. She was a very hungry kid and ate everything. Lily clung to Passion a lot and was shy at first.
They were adorable girls and we were excited to get them started in school and normal life at our house.  When they first came they didn't know much, nothing about the gospel and basic principles that our family was so familiar with.
It was such a learning curve and was hard to get used to.  It was definitely a challenge getting used to two girls in our home when we were not used to girls.  We did have our struggles but felt the whole experience was with it. 
We had the girls for 13 months and then it was determined they would go back to their birth dad Brandon.  This was hard because they started slowly transitioning the girls home and their emotions were all over the place.  They went home 2 days before Christmas in 2012.  We kept contact with them and talked to them when we could.  In April of 2013we got a call that we were getting them back. Once we got them back we had to go to endless court visits. By the way I hate court, my stomach just would get so sick as it was not my favorite place to be.  We went to mediation trying to get the parents to sign over their rights.  None of this worked.  July 2013 Tasha's rights were relinquished.  We then started to see what would happen with Brandon.  In  September his rights were relinquished and then we were able to move forward with Adoption.
It has been such a roller coaster but something that we definitely know we were suppose to do. We could feel Heavenly Fathers hand in the whole experience. It taught me to love unconditionally to all people. An amazing and humbling experience for me.

Asher's concussion

Today while we were fall cleaning Asher was jumping over the arm of e couch into the bean bag. Not sure what went wrong but he ended up on the floor screaming. Ten minutes later he couldn't remember anything and couldn't talk. We ended up running him to the emergency room. The whole way I was driving he kept crying saying he wanted his mom. I told him I was his mom and he cried harder saying I wasn't. He told the workers he was 4 years old and honestly couldn't remember anything. He ended up barfing all over in the hospital and was eventually released.  He came home and slept about 15 hours and then was back to normal.

Final Adoption (Novemener 11-16)

This week has been a crazy, exciting roller coaster week. We both started out with saddened emotions thinking of he girls biological parents. We were sad about their loss while we were celebrating a gain,

11/13/13- we went to the court for the adoption. It was fine, just lots of legal questions and then the legal changing of the girls names. There was really no feeling of the spirit but it was great to be at the stage in the process. They also let the kids adopt a stuffed animal for themselves. They thought that was the coolest thing ever.

-11/16/16- we were able to celebrate passions baptism and our sealing in the Brigham temple. We had he baptism at the stake center and then went in the gym with everyone for lunch. We left straight from their for the sealing. A little busy but totally worth it since we were already together. 

After passion was baptized and was Chaz gong she said I don't feel the Holy Ghost. She was almost waiting for something miracoulas. We later talked about her feeling of wanting to smile all day and that was the Holy host. It was great to have that teaching experience with her.  

This was an experience we will never forget. We loved being able to be in the temple with all four of our kids. 

The crazy thing about the day of the sealing is that was the exact day (two years prior) the girls were removed from their house and put into the Christmas box house.  (That was not planned at all)

- we will be forever grateful for family who supported us through this super hard process. To a heaven.y Father who knew what we were capable of and needed and guided us.  For an amazing case worker Sherrin and grandma Rosa. We truly don't think we would be where we are for the adoption without these people. They all played a key, crucial part in the process.

Goodbye visit

Today we had the final visit through the state with the girls mom. The state offers one last visit and then the rest is up to us if we will let the birth parents be involved in their life. I honestly don't think the visit could have gone any better. Right before we left our house I felt prompted to grab the small camera and gave it to passion. I told her she was in charge and could take pictures of whatever she wanted. This let her be in control.
The girls visited with the mom, grandma, aunt and cousins. It went perfect. There was little sadness displayed and a great time spent together. Nelson and I were there to tell all the family good bye. I was saddened as I walked away with these little girls. Sad she had to walk away and not have custody of her four kids she had. I was at peace and am grateful for the experience.

Final court hearing for the girls

Today Nelson and I prepared to go to the final trial for Brandon Sanchez (the girls dad). We had both been subpoenaed to testify against him. I was super nervous, I went to the bathroom about 4 times. Although I was nervous I knew I would be ok and say what I needed to. Before we went we fasted the girls would be able to receive permenancy and be able to move on with them life. They had been dealing with this for 2 years.
The moms rights were terminated two weeks prior. We went and visited her in jail. Bit of an uncomfortable feeling for me, it is not an environment I am familiar nor comfortable with.
We sat in the waiting room just waiting and w aiting. The dad hadn't showed up. Court started and he still was not there. They started the trial without him and we were all sworn in. I remember wondering if he would show up.
Trial started and they discussed all the evidence. The evidence was given and the judge gave his final decision. He determined the dads rights would be terminated and the girls would live in our home. The judge gave counsel that we need to do our part to include the grandparents. They do not deserve to be cut off due to other people's decision.
We left the place in complete shock in what had just happened. Throughout the rest of the day we had so many emotions including:
- pure gratitude- so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father for answering prayers and for her plans.
- humbled by the love and service that was shown to us by ward and family members.
- sadness- I was upset and sad beacause where one person wins there is someone that ones out sad. My heart ached for Brandon and the loss he went through. He had to tell people he lost his kids.
I was aching for the girls for their loss. No matter what the decision was there would be a loss.
Such a roller coaster of emotions with the whole experience. So grateful for this trial and learning experience we have gained.
When we told the girls that night they cried. They were sad to know their dad could not do his part. We hope and pray for peace And for everyone involved.

Ogden half marathon (Laura's race)

Two days ago I ran the Ogden half marathon. This is one of the few races I like to pay for. Years past during my race I would catch myself getting upset at the people flying past me as if I were not even moving. It would get to me and effect my running. This year was totally different. If someone did pass me I kept saying in my head this is my journey no one else's.  I have thought of that a lot. There is no reason to compare my life to anyone else's. I don't have to look, act or do the same as others. This is my journey in life and no one else's. Such a realization that I needed.
At the race a kid had on a shirt that said "COURAGE TO START, STRENGTH TO FINISH.
Quote that I loved and needed that day,

Denver Trip

Nelson's brother Spencer and his wife Jami have lived in Denver for some time. I am completely embarrassed to admit it has been 9 years since we have been out there to visit. I was pregnant with Asher last time we were there (wow that was awhile ago). I am not sure what has taken us so long to get back, big factor may have been my inability to sit and travel in a car. I am the worse road traveler out of our whole family, I don't do great. Whatever our excuses have been the last 9 years, we finally planned a trip last minute and headed out there. (Just a side note- our new plan is to not take 9 more years to get back). We absolutely love our family and are so grateful to spend time with them. Of couse while we were there we were able to play lots. Here are a few highlights from our trip:

Max went to work with Spencer and Loved it!!

Asher, Crew and Max playing around at the museum



Max is a big Bronco Fan.  He wanted to go on a tour of the Stadium so we took him.  There was some pretty interesting facts shared. Here are a few highlights from the tour. 
In this picture with Asher and I, I asked him, "Oh Ash why don't we ever have a normal picture".  He replied " mom it is always your fault, because the rest of us always have the same face, you are the one that is being different." 
Wow I guess he is right with that one- silly kid!